I'm now on day 5 of my first cycle of chemo!
There are times I look back and wonder if the last 2 months were real, and where the time has gone. It's still hard to digest that this is really happening, and that we're now post surgery and onto treatment.
Nurses tell me that time will fly and I'll look back and be surprised that it's all happened. At this point that is so hard to imagine...although, I'm surprised I'm almost a week post first cycle of chemo.
I still feel as if I'm in a bubble, sounds are different and everything about life feels different. It's as though life keeps going on as normal but I've been left to the sidelines - just watching and wondering when I'll join in again.
There's no way I could be part of normal life at the moment, my brain is just too slow - conversations are slow and processing anything meaningful is slow.
The nausea of the last 5 days have left my brain really foggy and energy levels really low. I'm just chilling with it, it'll be what it'll be as long as the chemo works its magic - that's all I care about.
In this new universe I live in I have met the most amazing human beings, and I look at my husband, family and friends and I marvel at their courage and support. In this new universe you meet everyday heroes who save, help and support people every day of their lives.
People who have my deepest admiration and thanks - how could we ever live without the nurses, surgeons, oncologists, counsellors and esoteric masseuses who are there ever so gently getting patients from one crucial step to the next.
It has been a truly humbling experience, that has touched me deeply and at times make me question how I give back to the universe on a day-to-day basis.