I thought I would write more often during my treatment, but it was simply too tiring to sit in front of a laptop to write. I did write a journal of sorts and will draw from it now that I plan to be more of a regular blogger.
Looking back, giving myself the space to be with each stage of treatment was essential.
To blog felt like something else I had to do, and I already had quite a to do list without pressuring myself to do more.
All treatment has now officially finished and I'm on to Herceptin every 3 weeks until May 2017. I've even had my first 3 monthly check-up - how crazy is that!!! Time really has flown, just as all the nurses kept telling me :-P and yet at times it feels like this journey has been a much longer part of my life.
This has indeed been a life changing experience and one that has been full of blessings.
As I look forward to new beginnings, it surprises me that I don't feel as relieved as I thought I would. Although I don't think about cancer every second of every day, life has changed and now it's figuring out the what and how. Life certainly isn't normal and it would be crazy if nothing had changed after everything that's happened.
I will draw and all past experiences (good and bad) as I move forward, like a baby chick taking very tentative steps. I still second guess myself about what I should be doing and what I should be eating - have I done enough today to stop it coming back?
Today though, it's Xmas eve and I am full of thanks and blessings and I will indeed be rejoicing and reflecting on the past and praying for the future.
To all that have been there for me this year I thank you from the bottom of my heart.